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If anyone ever asked me who's been the best , its my current love . Out of Zhafir , Fadhil and Syafii , Khalaf really really touched my heart . He's the one who's did it . The first time i felt guys was sweet , he proved it . After Syafii , i didn't really believe in love . All the bullshit about fighting , i thought it was a waste of time . Well , it is a waste of time until Khalaf showed me that fighting makes us bond more with each other . The first month with him was unstable , obvious reasons ; the fact we only knew each other for about 20 days . Then it became better , then we broke up . Everyone said i was so foolish to wait for him , maybe i was , maybe i was not . A few days later , after crying and cooping myself up in the room straight after coming home , he asked me to be his . I declined it , i was mature enough that the relationship wasn't going to last , i was mature enough that i knew i could move on without him . Yes , i was mature . He asked me again , and i declined it again . Then on Saturday , a week after we broke up , he asked me for the last time , yes i took him back , but in my mind , i knew that no one can be trusted anymore . A few days passed after that , and he just vanished , didn't hear any word from him except knowing he was sick and isn't able to go to school , FULLSTOP . For a whole week , i wondered and wondered where he went , i made my sys[Ayuu] , the victim to listen to my friggin pathetic stories about you . This one whole week has been about nothing except you . That made me lose my trust on you more . Day by day i couldn't care less about you . What ? Wasting my tears on you ? Everyone said its not worth it . Everyone asked me to let you go , but i wanted to stay with you . Eventho i didn't trust you , the love you gave me during the first month that we were together still stayed . The promises you made for me , you broke it , but i believe one day you'd prove that its true . No one ever realised how much love i put on you . And i don't think you realise it too . But , im just gonna move on , my life with you , im just gonna move on . Now i wonder , is it you that i need ? Cause i have others to care for me , and im downright happy with that .